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Basically, the theory explains that we are attracted to people who can wound us the same way we were wounded in our childhood, as our psyche tries to recreate the past void and save us by changing its ending.“The child in us believes that if the original perpetrators — or their current replacements — finally change their minds, apologize, or make up for that terrible rupture of trust, we can escape from our prison of unworthiness.And if you can’t spot the difference just yet, here are some pointers.Now, a lot of these differences require taking the time to know someone to figure out if the apple of your eye is indeed a man, or a mere boy. *To clarify, when I’m referring to “games” I mean mind games.
Or, read this post on “The 11 Differences Between Dating a Girl vs a Woman“.
But what if you find yourself playing second fiddle to his mother, or even worse, playing surrogate mama in her absence?
What if you didn’t discover how close he is with his mother until the relationship took a serious turn, wedding plans had been announced, or you two had moved in together? Watching a codependent mother-son relationship play out is a rather unsightly and disturbing thing to witness, in my opinion.
Also, if his mama tells him every move to make, it can condition him to be a lazy thinker so you may end up being the voice of reason for everything in her absence. Listen, this one should be a no-brainer, but if it still hasn’t clicked for you, allow me to break it down. Sure, he may pay a bill or two, but this man has no idea what it means to live on his own, do his own grocery shopping, or even how to budget.
If you settle down with this mama’s boy, just know that he will probably end up moving in with you too.